Here’s our own take on germ warfare. Something that the Bond movies did ages ago.
A half-inch vial containing deadly germs is tossed around from America to Chidambaram. Dr Govindarajan, the scientist who created it as part of President Bush’s project to make the world safer, calls it the last tango in Chidambaram, abode of the dancing lord Nataraja.

An ex-CIA turncoat, one of the ten faces of Kamal, is after the vial. In tow with him is Mallika Sherawat, also ex-CIA who wet her feet in, well, Pakistan.

Al Qaeda, Lashker-e-Toiba, ISI?, asks Balram Naidu, a man with RAW, the intelligence agency. Paunchy and ditzy, Naidu, another role played by Kamal, incidentally can speak five languages in Telugu!

Both vial and scientist travel in an air cargo hold, and lo and behold, we are in Chennai to the tunes of Saare Jahan Se Achha!

From here it’s a roller-coaster ride to Chidambaram. A cat and mouse game between ex-spy and bio-scientist is played out. Joining in is Asin as Andal. Her grandma (another Kamal), puts the vial in an idol of Perumal and scientist, spy and lass run around like headless chickens with the idol.

There is also a blood-spitting sardarji (Kamal yet again), a crooner. Whatever for? The filmathon (it is about 3 hours) takes a leap in time from the 12th century to 2004. The link emerges towards the end. The evil man finally gets hold of the vial and bites it as the game is up for him. Just then the area is hit by a tsunami. There is an interesting interlude about the futility of God, one who takes away so many lives. To be sure, the tsunami scenes are spectacular. That’s just about it. The ten roles are awfully disparate: they are more like pantomime characters.

Kamal appears too flabby and jaded. Sorry, Appu Raja (or shall we say Michael, Madana, Kamarajan) it’s time you start being your age. From start to finish there is a severe decibel assault aided and abetted by Himesh Reshammiya.

Although Kamal has penned the story and dialogues he has also hijacked the director’s job.
The credits open with the title “Ulaga maha nayagan” (world’s greatest actor). An ego trip of tsunami proportions.